Harlequin Presents - March 2006

I actually read my subscription batch of Harlequin Presents this month instead of just skimming the majority. HPs satisfy my need to read highly-formulaic, heightened-emotion romances. At the same time, I'm generally appalled by the stereotypes and characterization and often the writing as well in Presents. Total love-hate relationship. This month, I liked most but would only recommend the Graham and the Marton.

Lynne Graham - THE GREEK'S CHOSEN WIFE (HP 2523)

Graham is not the most sophisticated writer on the block--in fact I don't think Graham has met a noun she didn't think couldn't benefit from an adjective or two--but she writes romances that tap deeply and truly into wish-fulfillment fantasies and are sprinkled with humor and charm, not merely the ubiquitous angst. My guess is she's the line's best-selling author right now.

Prudence has lived apart from her husband of eight years although they've remained in touch. Both were manipulated into marriage to each other at a young age. He has other women, but everything changes when Prudence decides she wants a divorce so she can have a child. This shakes Nikolas up, forcing him to reevaluate his marriage to Prudence and whether he's finally ready to be a husband. Except now Prudence is going to take some convincing.

I liked this book a lot. Strangely enough, I was reminded a bit of Penelope and Odysseus' tale. These ridiculously chaste heroines allied to tomcat heroes smack too much of martyrdom for me to truly respect them, but Prudence at least did build a fulfilling life and wasn't a total doormat. And Graham does imbue her heroines with a innocent dignity that is appealing.

Like many of Graham's heros, Nikolas is charismatic, strong yet with hints of boyish charm, young (her heros can often be in their late twenties), capable of kindness (which too many romance authors seem to ignore in favor of writing alpha jerks), and most of all, is incredibly taken by his heroine, who may be unprepossessing in the eyes of the world. But you can also see why she appeals to him so.

There were scenes in THE GREEK'S CHOSEN WIFE I re-read as soon as I finished. Don't know what it is about Graham, but she's that rare Presents author whose books I keep to re-read.

Miranda Lee - THE BILLIONAIRE BOSS'S FORBIDDEN MISTRESS (HP 2524)

Oh, good lord, I don't do more than glance at the author name before reading these books, so I'm only just now focusing on this ridiculous title. Well, let's keep my blood pressure low and not dwell on it.

I give Lee credit for perhaps pioneering the heroine with a reasonable sexual past for HP, yet I find I generally don't like either her heroines or her heros. I can't put my finger on why.

TBBFM is about a gorgeous rich socialite working as a receptionist after her self esteem was knocked down by her now ex-husband after she was in an auto accident that left scars on the thighs. Her pain has made her less shallow. The hero is a self-made tycoon who acquires her workplace and wants her.

This book was especially weird because it had hints of the paranormal--the hero bought this company because he dreamed about it and his dead wife seems to tell him so, and the heroine's dad pushes the heroine toward the hero because his dead wife seems to be telling him to do so. The last scene shows that the graves of these two women are next to each other. Very, very strange for a Presents. Didn't work for me.

Also, stories about gorgeous women (in this case rich and privileged too) and powerful men who want them as mistresses generally don't work for me. These always smack more of sleaze than Cinderella on my romantic-fantasy-meter. More Judith Krantz than Jayne Ann Krentz, if you know what I mean.

Sandra Marton - THE DESERT VIRGIN (HP 2525)

This book is labeled "Uncut", meaning it's a Presents that is sexier than average. I can't say as I noticed, maybe because sex in the romance genre overall has become so unfettered that anything found in Presents will always be tame in comparison.

Marton is one of the best Presents authors. She can write a book that could stand on its own outside of HP packaging (i.e., it's more than just a thinly fleshed out formula.) This one went a bit over the top for me, although I enjoyed it. An American ballerina is kidnapped in Europe and sold into white slavery in a Middle East country. The hero is an American troubleshooter who realizes the person he's been hired to save in this country is probably dead but has a chance to save the heroine, whom he thinks is an international call girl type in over her head. They are imprisoned but make a daring escape.

The danger and adventure storyline is more reminiscent of Silhouette Intimate Moments, but I found it a welcome diversion. The end relied on a coincidence too large to bear, but otherwise this was an entertaining story.

Marton really seems to be stuck on a) Las Vegas, b) dancer heroines, c) larger than life families with plenty of hero and heroine fodder, d) more of a law-enforcement angle than the big business angle favored by most UK Commonwealth authors. I appreciate an American sensibility in HP once in a while.

Lucy Monroe - WEDDING VOW OF REVENGE (HP 2526)

Monroe is one of those rare HP authors who seems to be making a career for herself outside the line too. I've only read her Presents, and in this one, I didn't like the premise.

Angelo Gordon wants to seduce the unsuspecting ex-model Tara Peters because he thinks his bitterest enemy is getting ready to make a play for her, and Angelo in his revenge wants to make sure Tara is already taken...by him. After that seriously flawed set-up--is a hero so warped by revenge redeemable?--the story was fine. The heroine is actually embarking on a business career instead of a dead-end or no job as seems to so often be the case in this line. The hero is impressed by her brains as well as her model looks. He of course falls for her, but it's only a matter of time until she discovers his dastardly motives for pursuing her.

Beyond the stupid set-up, the plot and emotional journey was consistent, and the heroine strong and likable. She had convictions that she actually stood by. Rare stuff in this line. Better than average HP.

Fiona Hood-Stewart - THE ROYAL MARRIAGE (HP 2527)

The idea of royalty in contemporary times is generally abhorent to me--I'm a fan of elected governments!--so I'm not the target audience for all these stories. This book, though, was especially bad in having a ruling prince in his mid-30s paired with a headstrong, immature teenage bride. Terrible book.

On a tangential note--I'm amazed that such a simple title hasn't already been used in Harlequin Presents before. I thought only tortured variations of marketing keywords would remain by now, e.g., THE PRINCE'S BRAZILIAN VIRGIN or something. I bet it's a long time if ever before we'll see another title approaching THE ROYAL MARRIAGE's level of innocuousness.

Trish Morey - THE MANCINI BARGAIN (HP 2528)

Wow, this was another with a strange set-up that defied belief. I mean, even among Harlequin Presents you have to convince the reader to suspend their disbelief on some level. This book really fails.

Some dude in college married a friend as a favor because her father was pressuring her to marry an Arabian shiekh. But it was just a marriage of convenience, and they've lived separate lives for a dozen years. (Wow, what a great, enduring friendship! And what an appropriate solution to the problem at hand! The brainpower on display is dazzling.) The hero has basically had to put his dreams of a marriage for himself on hold. But now the sheikh married someone else, so these two are free to divorce. This is when they give in to passion for each other instead.

Also, this book must be a sequel because the backstory here is that the woman the sheikh married was someone the hero was dating, adding to the heroine's guilt for ruining the hero's life. Maybe this book was too much of an afterthought to the sheikh's novel, made to fit into the plot of the first, which is why it's so weak on its own.

Sharon Kendrick - THE ITALIAN'S LOVE CHILD (HP 269)

Subscribers get two extra books every month. I'm not sure why some HP books are chosen to be sold retail and others appear to only go to U.S. subscribers. This one is copyright 2003.

I liked this Sharon Kendrick book. The heroine is a morning television personality. She's a confident, mature, self-contained woman. I liked her. Although the story has the usual HP plot elements, they seemed more grounded in reality.

Eve meets banker Luca Cardelli at a party at a friend's house. As a teen she had a crush on him when he'd visited her town and she'd been a waitress at the yacht club where he kept a boat. He'd been kind to her. Now Luca is attracted to her. They embark on an affair that gets complicated by Eve becoming pregnant.

This book was consistent and quietly good. It didn't hit jarring notes. A well told tale of two people falling in love.

Catherine George - THEIR SCANDALOUS AFFAIR (HP 270)

Yaay, last book. I can't believe I'm wasting this much time writing about books that are essentially interchangable and disposable. I thought this was similiar in a way to the Kendrick. The heroine was a confident small-town business owner, and her relationship with the hero wasn't one where he called all the shots. The melodrama seemed to be lacking here. It was OK but didn't really engage my interest. I can kind of see why this wouldn't have made it into the main line-up.

I have to learn to have less things to say if I ever want to log my Harlequin Presents reading again. This is too much effort!